When I get nervous, I laugh and speak like I’m keeping up with Lorelai and Rory on the way to Luke’s. Especially when hard conversations come up. It’s hard to tell from the outside, because I’m always been a fast talker. But I know when I’m monologuing. And that wasn’t helping my relationships. I was […]

Shuffling papers, walking from the desk to the kitchen table to the counter, and muttering to myself, I was a whirlwind of activity. More like I was circling the drain. Michael said, “Babe, do one thing at a time.” Didn’t he just diagnose that situation? Have you ever been there, spinning your wheels and going […]

People are the best. Until they are the worst. And sometimes, it me. I can be the worst. Each of us can. How we cope with other people is another opportunity to observe ourselves. How do you deal with people in getting your needs met? (See this post on Enneagram Motivations!) Our interpersonal coping style, […]

“Be nice.”  “Don’t make a fuss.” “You’re so bossy.” Ever heard any of these? Uh, yeah. Me, too. Our culture has pushed several limiting beliefs about confrontation—and mostly to women. The message—well, the lie really—is confrontation is mean, aggressive, and not nice. That lie has turned into quite the monster in our culture. Sharon Hodde […]

I have seen some frankly stunning non-apologies this week. Words from public figures and people in positions of leadership whose words were characterized by a devastating lack of respect. The basic sentiment of a non-apology from this week: IF  what I said when you were mean to me was mean back, well you were really […]